Classic case of good cop/bad cop

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Tiger plotting to one up Jordan's unimpressive baseball career

We've all heard tales about the incessant ball busting between Tiger Woods and Michael Jordan. They're friends, but use every opportunity to zing one another in an effort to validate their most dominating athlete label. Upon hearing the jaw-dropping news that Micheal Jordan will be the assistant's assistant at the 2009 President's Cup, Tiger will reportedly take it up a notch and try his hand in baseball before returning to golf. He took this move straight from MJ's bag of tricks, mirroring the Hanes underware model's stint with the White Sox in the '90s. Tiger can be seen scouting at Sunday's Dodgers/Phillies game.

Andrew Giuliani is a little bitch part 2

Andrew Giuliani was lucky enough to be paired with Tiger Woods at the 2001 Buick Classic Pro Am. He was also lucky enough to get a spot on Duke's golf team. Now it is time for him to quit being a little b*tch and hang up the spikes already.

This week Duke University attorneys (who--between the infamous Duke LaCrosse Case, the female football player lawsuit (yes, Duke football is so bad even girls can make the team) and now this--must be the most overworked college attorney team in the nation) moved to see claims dismissed in the Giuliani case, saying the spoiled little bastard is a total douchebag and deserved to be kicked off the golf team.

“Andrew Giuliani is entitled to no more privileges than any other member of the Duke University student body,” the Sept. 10 filing says. "Put simply, Giuliani had no right to play varsity golf; he had an opportunity for the privilege to be part of a team, one ... that he squandered through his own conduct.''

That conduct included "throwing an apple in the face of another player, breaking a golf club during a tournament, injuring a teammate and becoming verbally abusive with a coach," according to The Associated Press.

Perhaps Jim Rome put it best when he said "Nothing says 'gentlemen's sport' like chucking an apple at another guy's face ... I mean the guy did everything except say 'Do you know who I am?'"

And we know exactly who he is, the son of a former New York City mayor and presidential candidate. But the credential that sheds the most light on why little Andrew would think to file a lawsuit in the first place is what his father was before any of that: A lawyer. Go figure.

Hopefully the case is thrown out and we'll finally hear the last of Andrew Giuliani's golfing career.

BWAAAH HA HA: Rudy Giuliani, long estranged from his son Andrew, probably thinks Andrew is a little bitch as well.

Men in Black

Tiger Woods and JB Holmes donned some atypical apparel during their clutch performances this weekend. Tiger’s glasses, although somewhat badass, are reminiscent of over-glasses typically worn by slowly driving senior citizens. Tiger wore the glasses mostly for protection against the blowing sand, and removed them prior to hitting each shot.

JB Holmes is one of the only notable players you'll ever see wearing a black glove. After making Mickelson look like less of a man in the playoff at the FBR Open, Holmes said, “I don’t want to be some kind of fairy dinking it out there and prancing around in my white glove. I hit it long, and I wear a black glove even if after the round, it looks like someone shit on my hand.” Ok... JB really didn’t say any of that, but it would have been funny if he did.

With all the outfit coordination these days, it’s surprising the black glove isn’t more popular. But then again, Tiger doesn’t wear one, so it’s not that surprising after all.

Tiger Woods: Good Acting or Actual Homophobia?